Conflict is just change trying to happen.
5 Conflict Modes
There are five ‘modes’ of engagement that people use when it comes to conflict. We use all five at different times, but we also have our favourites. We’re better or more comfortable at some modes that others, so they tend to be our go-to strategy when conflicts arise – especially if we’re feeling stressed. Here are the 5 Modes.
4 Domains of Conflict
Navigating and resolving conflict is always easier when understand exactly what the real issues are – when we’re all playing in the same domain. There are four key domains we need to understand.
Reframe the Game
Conflict is often seen as a negative. Yet conflict, a difference of opinions or ideas, leads to innovation and improvement. When we embrace conflict as an opportunity for growth, we gain clarity and better understanding of each other and our situation. We come up with new ways to improve and boost performance. Reframing how we think about conflict is a good place to start. Here are three ways to do that.
The Conflict Iceberg
In conflict situations, the main drivers of behaviour are often hidden below the waterline. If we don’t clarify those underlying causes, our attempts to resolve conflict may be sunk before we begin. Check out the Conflict Iceberg.
The Drama Triangle
Sometimes we confuse conflict with drama. Conflict is tension between competing positions, ideas or needs. True conflict is the raw material for positive innovation. Conflict is change trying to happen. Drama is different. It’s a disruptive, self-perpetuating cycle of three interrelated roles that people play – villain, victim and hero. Check out the Drama Triangle.